Monday, March 31, 2014

Attention: Reader, Writer, Critic Has Been Commandeered

It is my pleasure to inform you, dear followers, that after a long and arduous power struggle, this blog and its peasant population have been seized by none other than me, Catherine of Stray Imaginations, ruler of all humanity (a humanity which currently consists of two blogs, a thirty-five pound dog, and an arguably demonic younger brother, but that's irrelevant.)

You, being the curious followers that you are (we’ll fix that shortly) are probably wondering what this little hiccup means for you. Now that your old master has been forcibly shipped out of state for a week by means of drug-laced chocolate and the emotional influence of Disney Princess movies, things will be different. Much different.

(And to think I wasn’t even her first choice at opponent. Pssh. She underestimated my power.)

Don’t worry. Briana will be back in due time, and she will once again fight for control over you. She’ll probably lose, for I am the better chocolate confectioner, but I’ll grant you your false hope. What’s the worst you can do? Start a rebellion? (I know how the Hunger Games went down. I know what mistakes not to make.)

And by all this evil chatter of course I really mean we’re all going to have a giant party. A Briana-free, book-loving jamboree. That’s right. The parents are out of town and now you all get to party with the older sister! (In that metaphor, I’m the amazingly cool older sister, and Briana is the stuck-up parents. TAKE THAT, Briana.) I won’t rest until every one of my loyal peasants is partying their hearts out.

See? I’m a nice dictator. None of that arena-killing garbage.

(Let it also be noted that I did nothing incriminating to sway the other candidate’s choice. The good-luck gift I sent was not full of drugged chocolate. Trust me, not the lab test. Those can be faulty. I, on the other hand, have the honesty of a Candor.)

What can you look forward to this week? Games, quizzes, fun features, and so much awesomeness your head just might explode.

With that said, LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

Yours Truly,

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